The Team Jackulator Forums
April 26, 2024, 12:53:01 pm *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?

Login with username, password and session length
News:
   
   Home   Help playlist Arcade Search Media Downloads Login Register  
The Jackulator 9000 Forums
Pages: 1 2 [All]   Go Down
  Send this topic  |  Print  
This topic has not yet been rated!
You have not rated this topic. Select a rating:
Author Topic: you're chaperoning just like good americans  (Read 5199 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« on: July 22, 2010, 06:51:40 am »

I was looking around for a file from the Hybrid 3 era and found this chinatown joke randomizer I made a long time ago:

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of chaperoneing his witch
So his Dogg4 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the GoodAmericans do?
So he says, well how do the GoodAmericans do it?
And the Dogg4 says, well the GoodAmericans, first they chaperone a little bit then they blackmail
They go and shit8 a little Surgery, come back, chaperone a little bit more then they blackmail again
Then they go back and chaperone a little bit more
and then and they go out and they dog5 the shape or something like that, makes it more nuts2
so now, the guy goes home and he starts chaperoneing his own witch, see
so he chaperones for a little bit and then he blackmails and he goes out of the room and he reads OrangeJuice magazine
then he goes back and he starts chaperoneing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute witch,
and he goes out and he smokes a practice
now his witch is gettin angry2 as weather3,
he comes back in the room and starts chaperoneing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go dog5 the shape
the witch looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre chaperoneing just like GoodAmericans

EDIT: here's an updated version of the randomizer:

<a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank"><a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank">http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf</a></a>
Logged

jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #1 on: July 22, 2010, 06:52:14 am »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of SHIT10ing his Christian
So his Lando says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the FUCKINCATS do?
So he says, well how do the FUCKINCATS do it?
And the Lando says, well the FUCKINCATS, first they SHIT10 a little bit then they leave
They go and Dick2 a little salt2, come back, SHIT10 a little bit more then they leave again
Then they go back and SHIT10 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they train the hobby or something like that, makes it more SHIT9
so now, the guy goes home and he starts SHIT10ing his own Christian, see
so he SHIT10s for a little bit and then he leaves and he goes out of the room and he reads proposal magazine
then he goes back and he starts SHIT10ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Christian,
and he goes out and he smokes a cake
now his Christian is gettin boring as dick,
he comes back in the room and starts SHIT10ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go train the hobby
the Christian looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre SHIT10ing just like FUCKINCATS
Logged

jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #2 on: July 22, 2010, 06:59:08 am »

these are just random like the Jack Stories app I made, but after I did the first two in the post I kept hitting the reset button until I got a combination I liked -- only took a few tries when the machine spit out this gem:

Podcast


My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of smacking his Batman0
So his FaggotyWhiteCurtis says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the QueerPartyFriends do?
So he says, well how do the QueerPartyFriends do it?
And the FaggotyWhiteCurtis says, well the QueerPartyFriends, first they smack a little bit then they think3
They go and Dick2 a little fudgepacker, come back, smack a little bit more then they think3 again
Then they go back and smack a little bit more
and then and they go out and they Fire the hole or something like that, makes it more new2
so now, the guy goes home and he starts smacking his own Batman0, see
so he smacks for a little bit and then he think3s and he goes out of the room and he reads plot magazine
then he goes back and he starts smacking again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Batman0,
and he goes out and he smokes a jockstrap
now his Batman0 is gettin sweet3 as thought,
he comes back in the room and starts smacking again
he gets up to start to leave again to go Fire the hole
the Batman0 looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre smacking just like QueerPartyFriends

EDIT: figured, why not just upload the app -- doesn't have the audio but you still get the text:

<a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank"><a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank">http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf</a></a>
Logged

marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #3 on: July 22, 2010, 07:40:34 am »

 smacking his batman  grin

the insanity

Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
buster01
"Whenever we go out, the people always shout, there goes John Jacob Jingleheimerschmidt."
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Location: State mental institution...no that's the Wilshire country club I'm lucky they let me join
Posts: 1158



Awards
« Reply #4 on: July 22, 2010, 02:27:58 pm »

Holy fuck I thought my head was gonna explode from laughing too hard listening to the "smacking his batman" joke. Too random. Too random.  T_Goofy1 T's joker T_Shock3 T_Shock1 T_grin7 cheesy huh
Logged

RussW
MEGAMEMBER
Jack Master
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 319


Awards
« Reply #5 on: July 22, 2010, 11:56:27 pm »

wow that story creator is wild

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of babying his beaver
So his custodian says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the models do?
So he says, well how do the models do it?
And the custodian says, well the models, first they baby a little bit then they hug
They go and fuck2 a little man0, come back, baby a little bit more then they hug again
Then they go back and baby a little bit more
and then and they go out and they soap the whacko or something like that, makes it more martian2
so now, the guy goes home and he starts babying his own beaver, see
so he babys for a little bit and then he hugs and he goes out of the room and he reads HairDryer magazine
then he goes back and he starts babying again, and says, Excuse me for a minute beaver,
and he goes out and he smokes a point
now his beaver is gettin witty as ReasonAndAccountability,
he comes back in the room and starts babying again
he gets up to start to leave again to go soap the whacko
the beaver looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre babying just like models
Logged
jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #6 on: July 23, 2010, 01:37:45 am »

hahaaa thats a good one -- I love it when they actually make sense in a weird way

I actually went on a tear a couple hours ago -- probably pushed the button 50 times...

these were the best:

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of SexualAssaulting his garbageman
So his baby2 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the TrainedProfessionals do?
So he says, well how do the TrainedProfessionals do it?
And the baby2 says, well the TrainedProfessionals, first they SexualAssault a little bit then they blackmail
They go and model a little Renoir, come back, SexualAssault a little bit more then they blackmail again
Then they go back and SexualAssault a little bit more
and then and they go out and they trick2 the AngerManagementTherapist or something like that, makes it more rational
so now, the guy goes home and he starts SexualAssaulting his own garbageman, see
so he SexualAssaults for a little bit and then he blackmails and he goes out of the room and he reads sixteen magazine
then he goes back and he starts SexualAssaulting again, and says, Excuse me for a minute garbageman,
and he goes out and he smokes a cheese
now his garbageman is gettin quiet3 as sugarpants,
he comes back in the room and starts SexualAssaulting again
he gets up to start to leave again to go trick2 the AngerManagementTherapist
the garbageman looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre SexualAssaulting just like TrainedProfessionals

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of leaveing his dog5
So his friend2 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the strippers do?
So he says, well how do the strippers do it?
And the friend2 says, well the strippers, first they leave a little bit then they fight
They go and prick a little spouse, come back, leave a little bit more then they fight again
Then they go back and leave a little bit more
and then and they go out and they fuck2 the system or something like that, makes it more angry
so now, the guy goes home and he starts leaveing his own dog5, see
so he leaves for a little bit and then he fights and he goes out of the room and he reads crab3 magazine
then he goes back and he starts leaveing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute dog5,
and he goes out and he smokes a crack
now his dog5 is gettin naked0 as lunch6,
he comes back in the room and starts leaveing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go fuck2 the system
the dog5 looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre leaveing just like strippers

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of dicking his SeniorCitizen
So his HoneyFuck says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the shmucks do?
So he says, well how do the shmucks do it?
And the HoneyFuck says, well the shmucks, first they dick a little bit then they celebrate
They go and tease2 a little ass4, come back, dick a little bit more then they celebrate again
Then they go back and dick a little bit more
and then and they go out and they SHIT10 the stinger or something like that, makes it more hairy
so now, the guy goes home and he starts dicking his own SeniorCitizen, see
so he dicks for a little bit and then he celebrates and he goes out of the room and he reads model magazine
then he goes back and he starts dicking again, and says, Excuse me for a minute SeniorCitizen,
and he goes out and he smokes a gate
now his SeniorCitizen is gettin erotic as TEA2,
he comes back in the room and starts dicking again
he gets up to start to leave again to go SHIT10 the stinger
the SeniorCitizen looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre dicking just like shmucks

EDIT: I updated it:

<a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank"><a href="http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf" target="_blank">http://www.jackulator.com/flash/ChinatownJokeRandomizerNew.swf</a></a>
Logged

TitoChe
MISSING IN ACTION
100 Club
*
Offline Offline

Location: 1712 Alameida, 712 North Aurora,,Broadway?
Posts: 121



Awards
« Reply #7 on: October 24, 2010, 11:46:28 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of pictureing his homophobe
So his ElephantGirl says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the people3 do?
So he says, well how do the people3 do it?
And the ElephantGirl says, well the people3, first they picture a little bit then they cry
They go and lift a little elephant, come back, picture a little bit more then they cry again
Then they go back and picture a little bit more
and then and they go out and they X-Ray the adoption or something like that, makes it more fuckball
so now, the guy goes home and he starts pictureing his own homophobe, see
so he pictures for a little bit and then he crys and he goes out of the room and he reads kiss magazine
then he goes back and he starts pictureing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute homophobe,
and he goes out and he smokes a crotch
now his homophobe is gettin FuckinGreat as balls,
he comes back in the room and starts pictureing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go X-Ray the adoption
the homophobe looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre pictureing just like people3

lolololol.....
Logged

jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2010, 06:59:58 am »

holy shit... I read and enjoyed yours, but then I scrolled up and saw something which, if you remember the media reports a while back about the Russian mob running forced prostitution houses for underage girls somehow suggests this Chinatown joke randomizer is actually keeping up with the times:

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of sex3ing his Soviet
So his doctor2 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the PreteenModels do?
So he says, well how do the PreteenModels do it?
And the doctor2 says, well the PreteenModels, first they sex3 a little bit then they clock2
They go and shape a little Dad3, come back, sex3 a little bit more then they clock2 again
Then they go back and sex3 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they picture3 the man2 or something like that, makes it more sweet3
so now, the guy goes home and he starts sex3ing his own Soviet, see
so he sex3s for a little bit and then he clock2s and he goes out of the room and he reads kid2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts sex3ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Soviet,
and he goes out and he smokes a AnAK-47AssaultRifle
now his Soviet is gettin diabetic as shampoo,
he comes back in the room and starts sex3ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go picture3 the man2
the Soviet looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre sex3ing just like PreteenModels
Logged

CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2010, 11:14:43 am »

 grin grin cool cool this made my day!
thanks Jack  cheesy


"My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of HELP2ing his Fiddler
So his lobster says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the TrainedProfessionals do?
So he says, well how do the TrainedProfessionals do it?
And the lobster says, well the TrainedProfessionals, first they HELP2 a little bit then they fight"
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



Sweaty_Garbage

old pro
***
Offline Offline

Location: In the dumpster
Posts: 99


Another Big Wad Of Sweaty Garbage!


WWW Awards
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2010, 05:16:14 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of Dick2ing his OldCactusRachmaninov
So his dog says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the models do?
So he says, well how do the models do it?
And the dog says, well the models, first they Dick2 a little bit then they guess
They go and fuck3 a little boat, come back, Dick2 a little bit more then they guess again
Then they go back and Dick2 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they knee the asskisser or something like that, makes it more nice
so now, the guy goes home and he starts Dick2ing his own OldCactusRachmaninov, see
so he Dick2s for a little bit and then he guesss and he goes out of the room and he reads basket3 magazine
then he goes back and he starts Dick2ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute OldCactusRachmaninov,
and he goes out and he smokes a rule
now his OldCactusRachmaninov is gettin pretty as work3,
he comes back in the room and starts Dick2ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go knee the asskisser
the OldCactusRachmaninov looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre Dick2ing just like models
Logged

"Keep It Jack, To Hell And Back."

funny gifs
marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2010, 09:11:23 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of Helping his chicken
So his baby says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the strippers do?
So he says, well how do the strippers do it?
And the baby says, well the strippers, first they Help a little bit then they celebrate
They go and Stop4 a little baby, come back, Help a little bit more then they celebrate again
Then they go back and Help a little bit more
and then and they go out and they doctor2 the infant or something like that, makes it more Soviet
so now, the guy goes home and he starts Helping his own chicken, see
so he Helps for a little bit and then he celebrates and he goes out of the room and he reads quest magazine
then he goes back and he starts Helping again, and says, Excuse me for a minute chicken,
and he goes out and he smokes a sex
now his chicken is gettin giant as people,
he comes back in the room and starts Helping again
he gets up to start to leave again to go doctor2 the infant
the chicken looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre Helping just like strippers
Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2010, 11:43:17 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of Helping his chicken
So his baby says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the strippers do?
So he says, well how do the strippers do it?
And the baby says, well the strippers, first they Help a little bit then they celebrate
They go and Stop4 a little baby, come back, Help a little bit more then they celebrate again
Then they go back and Help a little bit more
and then and they go out and they doctor2 the infant or something like that, makes it more Soviet
so now, the guy goes home and he starts Helping his own chicken, see
so he Helps for a little bit and then he celebrates and he goes out of the room and he reads quest magazine
then he goes back and he starts Helping again, and says, Excuse me for a minute chicken,
and he goes out and he smokes a sex
now his chicken is gettin giant as people,
he comes back in the room and starts Helping again
he gets up to start to leave again to go doctor2 the infant
the chicken looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre Helping just like strippers

hahaa oh that's nice -- not even sure why like most of those but yeah --  grin grin
Logged

CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #13 on: November 06, 2010, 03:27:35 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of interrupting his midget
So his chicken5 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the shmucks do?
So he says, well how do the shmucks do it?
And the chicken5 says, well the shmucks, first they interrupt a little bit then they murder
They go and lift a little cookie, come back, interrupt a little bit more then they murder again
Then they go back and interrupt a little bit more
and then and they go out and they baptise the insurance or something like that, makes it more big
so now, the guy goes home and he starts interrupting his own midget, see
so he interrupts for a little bit and then he murders and he goes out of the room and he reads nut magazine
then he goes back and he starts interrupting again, and says, Excuse me for a minute midget,
and he goes out and he smokes a fence
now his midget is gettin Sexual as BreastImplants,
he comes back in the room and starts interrupting again
he gets up to start to leave again to go baptise the insurance
the midget looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre interrupting just like shmucks

 cheesy cheesy
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #14 on: November 06, 2010, 07:05:50 pm »

gettin Sexual as BreastImplants

 grin grin grin
Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
Sweaty_Garbage

old pro
***
Offline Offline

Location: In the dumpster
Posts: 99


Another Big Wad Of Sweaty Garbage!


WWW Awards
« Reply #15 on: November 07, 2010, 12:05:21 am »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of dog3ing his custodian
So his Tsar says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the people do?
So he says, well how do the people do it?
And the Tsar says, well the people, first they dog3 a little bit then they investigate
They go and ride a little shitbox3, come back, dog3 a little bit more then they investigate again
Then they go back and dog3 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they hear2 the pickle or something like that, makes it more gay
so now, the guy goes home and he starts dog3ing his own custodian, see
so he dog3s for a little bit and then he investigates and he goes out of the room and he reads promise2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts dog3ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute custodian,
and he goes out and he smokes a picture2
now his custodian is gettin available as SexSexSex,
he comes back in the room and starts dog3ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go hear2 the pickle
the custodian looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre dog3ing just like people
Logged

"Keep It Jack, To Hell And Back."

funny gifs
TitoChe
MISSING IN ACTION
100 Club
*
Offline Offline

Location: 1712 Alameida, 712 North Aurora,,Broadway?
Posts: 121



Awards
« Reply #16 on: November 07, 2010, 07:15:20 am »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of fuck3ing his Darlin
So his OldCactusRachmaninov says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the PreteenModels do?
So he says, well how do the PreteenModels do it?
And the OldCactusRachmaninov says, well the PreteenModels, first they fuck3 a little bit then they work2
They go and shovel a little jew, come back, fuck3 a little bit more then they work2 again
Then they go back and fuck3 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they work the fuck4 or something like that, makes it more cute
so now, the guy goes home and he starts fuck3ing his own Darlin, see
so he fuck3s for a little bit and then he work2s and he goes out of the room and he reads assertion2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts fuck3ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Darlin,
and he goes out and he smokes a Untitled-4
now his Darlin is gettin wacko as luxury3,
he comes back in the room and starts fuck3ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go work the fuck4
the Darlin looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre fuck3ing just like PreteenModels

Pedo joke
Logged

1972 Canyon Dr
Oh that is not true
n00bslayer
100 Club
*
Offline Offline

Location: Monash County
Posts: 198


I just took a shit in the toilet like a big boy


Awards
« Reply #17 on: November 12, 2010, 05:33:26 pm »

After a few clicks I got this beaut.

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of investigateing his mother
So his PuppyDog says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the shmucks do?
So he says, well how do the shmucks do it?
And the PuppyDog says, well the shmucks, first they investigate a little bit then they die
They go and yardstick a little Nickel, come back, investigate a little bit more then they die again
Then they go back and investigate a little bit more
and then and they go out and they FUCK9 the shitball or something like that, makes it more angry
so now, the guy goes home and he starts investigateing his own mother, see
so he investigates for a little bit and then he dies and he goes out of the room and he reads BUDDY magazine
then he goes back and he starts investigateing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute mother,
and he goes out and he smokes a taco3
now his mother is gettin neurotic as TrainedProfessionals,
he comes back in the room and starts investigateing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go FUCK9 the shitball
the mother looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre investigateing just like shmucks
Logged

Sweaty_Garbage

old pro
***
Offline Offline

Location: In the dumpster
Posts: 99


Another Big Wad Of Sweaty Garbage!


WWW Awards
« Reply #18 on: November 13, 2010, 04:40:34 am »

Hope you all forgive me for this but uh, posting just one of these is not gonna be possible. smiley

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of mothering his Batman
So his PorcupineGiant says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the people3 do?
So he says, well how do the people3 do it?
And the PorcupineGiant says, well the people3, first they mother a little bit then they murder2
They go and Stop3 a little place, come back, mother a little bit more then they murder2 again
Then they go back and mother a little bit more
and then and they go out and they drive the fish or something like that, makes it more free
so now, the guy goes home and he starts mothering his own Batman, see
so he mothers for a little bit and then he murder2s and he goes out of the room and he reads noodle2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts mothering again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Batman,
and he goes out and he smokes a mystic
now his Batman is gettin cool2 as sarcasm,
he comes back in the room and starts mothering again
he gets up to start to leave again to go drive the fish
the Batman looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre mothering just like people3


My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of X-Raying his daughter
So his Lando says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the doctors do?
So he says, well how do the doctors do it?
And the Lando says, well the doctors, first they X-Ray a little bit then they shoot
They go and investigate a little hardon2, come back, X-Ray a little bit more then they shoot again
Then they go back and X-Ray a little bit more
and then and they go out and they walk the motherfucker3 or something like that, makes it more sugartits
so now, the guy goes home and he starts X-Raying his own daughter, see
so he X-Rays for a little bit and then he shoots and he goes out of the room and he reads master magazine
then he goes back and he starts X-Raying again, and says, Excuse me for a minute daughter,
and he goes out and he smokes a friend6
now his daughter is gettin curious as CaffinatedTurkey,
he comes back in the room and starts X-Raying again
he gets up to start to leave again to go walk the motherfucker3
the daughter looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre X-Raying just like doctors


My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of walking his Christian
So his fuckbuddy2 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the strippers do?
So he says, well how do the strippers do it?
And the fuckbuddy2 says, well the strippers, first they walk a little bit then they clock
They go and shoot a little FuckinCockblocker, come back, walk a little bit more then they clock again
Then they go back and walk a little bit more
and then and they go out and they come2 the Joker or something like that, makes it more small2
so now, the guy goes home and he starts walking his own Christian, see
so he walks for a little bit and then he clocks and he goes out of the room and he reads condom magazine
then he goes back and he starts walking again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Christian,
and he goes out and he smokes a attrition
now his Christian is gettin tight2 as KiddyPorn,
he comes back in the room and starts walking again
he gets up to start to leave again to go come2 the Joker
the Christian looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre walking just like strippers

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of fuck4ing his kid2
So his doctor says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the spiders do?
So he says, well how do the spiders do it?
And the doctor says, well the spiders, first they fuck4 a little bit then they die
They go and work2 a little Renoir, come back, fuck4 a little bit more then they die again
Then they go back and fuck4 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they fiddlefuck the Vagina or something like that, makes it more shit3
so now, the guy goes home and he starts fuck4ing his own kid2, see
so he fuck4s for a little bit and then he dies and he goes out of the room and he reads ClearBlueWater magazine
then he goes back and he starts fuck4ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute kid2,
and he goes out and he smokes a health
now his kid2 is gettin fat as ReecesPieces,
he comes back in the room and starts fuck4ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go fiddlefuck the Vagina
the kid2 looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre fuck4ing just like spiders


My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of SexualAssaulting his ninja
So his man3 says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the people do?
So he says, well how do the people do it?
And the man3 says, well the people, first they SexualAssault a little bit then they come2
They go and dick a little hardon, come back, SexualAssault a little bit more then they come2 again
Then they go back and SexualAssault a little bit more
and then and they go out and they dress the tooth2 or something like that, makes it more white
so now, the guy goes home and he starts SexualAssaulting his own ninja, see
so he SexualAssaults for a little bit and then he come2s and he goes out of the room and he reads CertificateOfAuthenticity magazine
then he goes back and he starts SexualAssaulting again, and says, Excuse me for a minute ninja,
and he goes out and he smokes a paperback
now his ninja is gettin macho as bunkmates,
he comes back in the room and starts SexualAssaulting again
he gets up to start to leave again to go dress the tooth2
the ninja looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Logged

"Keep It Jack, To Hell And Back."

funny gifs
jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #19 on: November 13, 2010, 11:31:25 am »

love the fish -- makes it more free haha

OMG... that third was is fucked up -- tight as kiddie porn???

spiders fuckin their kids and dying ?? hahaa.... you're fuckin just like spiders.

wow haha... those were shockingly messed up -- but funny as hell
Logged

CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #20 on: October 06, 2012, 05:29:55 pm »

since you're back Jack, would be um possible to update the story creator sometime? I mean this thing:
http://www.jackulator.com/smf/index.php?action=JackStories

I don't remember how much work it is so ya know, I'm not adamant about this. But it be cool to hear some new phrases. Since this was made before Bucket list and a few other movies I think. I know there's quite a bit more you could add right?  cool I know that "fiddlefuck" (as a verb) is missing. lipsrsealed
I was thinking of possibly changing the sentence a little, to make it more new.
something like this:

"...at first because the_plural noun_"telling somebody"_"some kind of statment like: "I have trouble expressing myself when on the verge of exploding in my pants"_"they were gonna"_verb...."

instead of just another "ing" past tense verb after the plural noun. There are three of them already. There will still be two if you change it like that or some other way. just an idea.


I have this link right on the top of my firefox browser so whenever I'm feeling down, and I need a quick laugh, I go to it.  cheesy
----------------

posted by sweaty garbage:
"and then and they go out and they fiddlefuck the Vagina or something like that, makes it more shit3"
 grin grin grin funniest thing I heard all week. some time I'm with my girlfriend, I'm gonna say some derivative of that. "Wanna fiddlefuck?"  grin

Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



jackulator
... --- ...
Administrator
jackulator.com
******
Offline Offline

Location: Eastwick, Rhode Island
Posts: 10507


"Twenty pushups a day..."


WWW Awards
« Reply #21 on: October 08, 2012, 06:04:12 pm »

yeah I could do that, but I'm spending so much time every day on my poker game -- once I finish it I'll be available for stuff like that  cheesy
Logged

CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #22 on: August 05, 2017, 08:22:05 pm »

fired up the old story-creator the other day and had a huge laugh  T_Grin2 T_Grin2

this   hot   major   Harry Sanborn   he's tired of    deep throat   ing his   fudge packer   so his   sailor   says to him hey, Why Ain't ya do it like the:   Miss   do
he says; well how do the   Miss   do it? …So the   sailor   says well the    Miss   first they   deep throat   a little bit, then they   brush   and they go and   cage   a little
ass   come back,   deep throat   a little bit more then they   brush   again… they they come back and   deep throat   a little bit more then they go out and contemplate   BEER   or something like that, makes it more   nervous   So now, the   major
goes home and starts   deep throat   ing his own   fudge packer   see. So he   deep throat   for a little bit then he   brush   and he goes out the room and he reads   0   magazine… then he comes back in and starts   deep throat   ing again and he says excuse me a minute;
fudge packer   and he goes out and he   bone   's a   COUNTREEEEEEEEE   Now his   fudge packer   is getting   woody   as   one of those tiny model trains   …He comes back in he starts   deep throat
ing again, he gets up to    start to leave again to go    cage   the   ass   and his    fudge packer   looks at him and says:   HEY, WHATS A MATTER WITH YA?   YOU'RE   deep throat   ING JUST LIKE A   Miss
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #23 on: August 06, 2017, 02:58:30 pm »

this   proud   cow,   Armani   he's tired of    lift   ing his   goddamn vegetable   so his   master   says to him hey, Why Ain't ya do it like the:   son of a bitch   do
he says; well how do the   son of a bitch   do it? …So the   master   says well the    son of a bitch   first they   lift   a little bit, then they   bear   and they go and   paint   a little
breast   come back,   lift   a little bit more then they   bear   again… they they come back and   lift   a little bit more then they go out and contemplate   condoms   or something like that, makes it more   ooooold   So now, the   cow
goes home and starts   lift   ing his own   goddamn vegetable   see. So he   lift   for a little bit then he   bear   and he goes out the room and he reads   Cuban Made AK-47 Assault Rifle   magazine… then he comes back in and starts   lift   ing again and he says excuse me a minute;
goddamn vegetable   and he goes out and he   eat   's a   ass   Now his   goddamn vegetable   is getting   fresh and sparkling   as   Chinese soup   …He comes back in he starts   lift
ing again, he gets up to    start to leave again to go    paint   the   breast   and his    goddamn vegetable   looks at him and says:   HEY, WHATS A MATTER WITH YA?   YOU'RE   lift   ING JUST LIKE A   son of a bitch
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #24 on: August 10, 2017, 07:51:04 pm »

this   resentful   private investigator   joker   he's tired of    stack   ing his   Colonel   so his   president   says to him hey, Why Ain't ya do it like the:   MARINE!!!!   do
he says; well how do the   MARINE!!!!   do it? …So the   president   says well the    MARINE!!!!   first they   stack   a little bit, then they   PIE HOLE   and they go and   defecate   a little
mini-wini   come back,   stack   a little bit more then they   PIE HOLE   again… they they come back and   stack   a little bit more then they go out and contemplate   cubans   or something like that, makes it more   beautiful   So now, the   private investigator
goes home and starts   stack   ing his own   Colonel   see. So he   stack   for a little bit then he   PIE HOLE   and he goes out the room and he reads   pussy farts   magazine… then he comes back in and starts   stack   ing again and he says excuse me a minute;
Colonel   and he goes out and he   oil   's a   little red beaver   Now his   Colonel   is getting   SHIT9   as   excercize   …He comes back in he starts   stack
ing again, he gets up to    start to leave again to go    defecate   the   mini-wini   and his    Colonel   looks at him and says:   HEY, WHATS A MATTER WITH YA?   YOU'RE   stack   ING JUST LIKE A   MARINE!!!!
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #25 on: August 13, 2017, 09:04:59 am »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of runing his FlightAttendant2
So his Baatman says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the victims do?
So he says, well how do the victims do it?
And the Baatman says, well the victims, first they run a little bit then they Fruck
They go and pop a little duck2, come back, run a little bit more then they Fruck again
Then they go back and run a little bit more
and then and they go out and they smack the show or something like that, makes it more tired
so now, the guy goes home and he starts runing his own FlightAttendant2, see
so he runs for a little bit and then he Frucks and he goes out of the room and he reads bacon2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts runing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute FlightAttendant2,
and he goes out and he smokes a book
now his FlightAttendant2 is gettin refreshin as turkeys,
he comes back in the room and starts runing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go smack the show
the FlightAttendant2 looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre runing just like victims

 critiqueJack smiley critiqueJack smiley
Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #26 on: August 13, 2017, 07:22:31 pm »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of dog3ing his Dogg4
So his junkie says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the models do?
So he says, well how do the models do it?
And the junkie says, well the models, first they dog3 a little bit then they fuck4
They go and Dick2 a little knee, come back, dog3 a little bit more then they fuck4 again
Then they go back and dog3 a little bit more
and then and they go out and they Fruck the back or something like that, makes it more giantXXXXXXXX
so now, the guy goes home and he starts dog3ing his own Dogg4, see
so he dog3s for a little bit and then he fuck4s and he goes out of the room and he reads Dick2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts dog3ing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute Dogg4,
and he goes out and he smokes a apple2
now his Dogg4 is gettin spicy as QueerPartyFriends,
he comes back in the room and starts dog3ing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go Fruck the back
the Dogg4 looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre dog3ing just like models
Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
CallMeBronco
I'm Mr. Buznik's dick
MEGAMEMBER
Team Jackulator
****
Offline Offline

Location: I don't know
Posts: 2472

I'm dead! Help me out! I'm dyin' here!


Awards
« Reply #27 on: September 23, 2017, 11:33:40 am »

this   potentially upsetting   fucking cocksucker   Copi Luac   he's tired of    nail   ing his   BATMAN!   so his   jew2   says to him hey, Why Ain't ya do it like the:   flying willard   do.    He says; well how do the   
flying willard   do it? …So the   jew2   says well the    flying willard   first they   nail   a little bit, then they   calculate   and they go and   FUCK!5   a little   expression   
come back,   nail   a little bit more then they   calculate   again… they they come back and   nail   a little bit more then they go out and contemplate   noodle salad   or something like that, makes it more   dickless   So now, the   fucking cocksucker   goes home and starts   
nail   ing his own   BATMAN!   see. So he   nail   for a little bit then he   calculate   and he goes out the room and he    chew   s a   cigar   then he comes back in and starts   nail   in' again and says excuse me a minute
BATMAN!   and he goes out and he   drag   's a   decoratin' business   Now his   BATMAN!   is getting   red    as   tension   …He comes back in he starts   nail   
ing again, he gets up to    start to leave again to go    FUCK!5   the   expression   so his    BATMAN!   looks at him and says:   HEY, WHATS A MATTER WITH YA?   YOU'RE   nail   ING JUST LIKE A   flying willard   AHAHAHAHAHA
Logged

my jackulator tribute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtbIpQTjH7M



"Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight" - Bruce Cockburn



marleycake
any colour you like
Team Jackulator
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2643


spray paint my mind on a fucking wall


WWW Awards
« Reply #28 on: September 24, 2017, 06:14:44 am »

My nextdoor neighbor,
Hes tired of scheduleing his fuckbuddy
So his BusinessPartner says to him hey
Why aint you do it like the monkeys do?
So he says, well how do the monkeys do it?
And the BusinessPartner says, well the monkeys, first they schedule a little bit then they pork
They go and slit a little Jerry, come back, schedule a little bit more then they pork again
Then they go back and schedule a little bit more
and then and they go out and they confuse the doll or something like that, makes it more grotesque
so now, the guy goes home and he starts scheduleing his own fuckbuddy, see
so he schedules for a little bit and then he porks and he goes out of the room and he reads house2 magazine
then he goes back and he starts scheduleing again, and says, Excuse me for a minute fuckbuddy,
and he goes out and he smokes a apple2
now his fuckbuddy is gettin gay2 as rent,
he comes back in the room and starts scheduleing again
he gets up to start to leave again to go confuse the doll
the fuckbuddy looks at him and says Hey!
Whats the matter with you?
Youre scheduleing just like monkeys
Logged




you ever dance naked outside red lobster? ...well, you're just letting the best of life pass you by.
metalboss44
Prince Chicken
Jack Mod
Team Jackulator
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1620



WWW Awards
« Reply #29 on: September 24, 2017, 11:16:19 pm »

Ah the storymaker, Im gettin nostalgic here
Logged

Stu-Pot
jackboard fan
**
Offline Offline

Location: Sweeden
Posts: 45


Awards
« Reply #30 on: September 25, 2017, 04:19:54 pm »

Me And My baby2 Ndugu2
We Were Both Thinking Chicken In The Carribbean
And All Of A Sudden Some Pretty Good chicken5
Comes Out Smelling Like A Couple Pieces

.....

I Thought It Was Very Relaxing At First
Because The Good Americans Talkin On My Cell
They Were Gonna Investigate Me
While My friend Decided 2 Take A Little Road Trip
Telling Somebody No Thanks Required

 grin Jack n Ndugu thinkin about chicken in the Caribbean.
Logged
Pages: 1 2 [All]   Go Up
  Send this topic  |  Print  
 
Jump to:  



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.5 | SMF © 2006-2008, Simple Machines LLC | Sitemap Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 1.171 seconds with 20 queries.