in seriousness; I doubt the regular occasional fart is going to save you from cancer; like John Oliver said about yet another stupid study of late "If that was the case then cancer would gone now! I don't think I'd be hearing about it on the three o'clock show with Dr. Oz."
To actually have some kind of effect you'd probably have to shove your face into everyone's ass crack you meet at the party for five minutes each and take a few good deep breaths. How about this for the new substitute of shaking hands?
